The Author of our Story

As you can see, we received our photos from our engagement session... the session was less than a week ago! Talk about FAST work! I just haven't said THANK YOU enough to Adam Szarmack for capturing so much of who we are in these pictures. I am overwhelmed every time I look at them..... and trust me, that's A LOT!! I hope you can enjoy them almost as much as I do. :-)

Seeing the pictures and reading everyone's sweet comments (especially on facebook) makes this journey even more real than it already was. For some of you that may not know my background, there's a couple things you should know that might help explain why there will be many emotional moments along the way, as I get closer to marrying my best friend.

All through middle school and high school, I was a total Disney junkie. I believed so strongly in the message of amazing love that was offered by movies such as Beauty and the Beast (my fave!), The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, and Cinderella. I believed in it, but I never experienced it. As my mom can attest, throughout high school I spent many afternoons with my head buried in my pillow, sobbing, because everyone around me and every girl I knew had a guy to sweep them off their feet.... every girl except me. To get really honest, it created a very negative complex in my life. I never had a prom date, never had a movie-partner, and didn't go to most dances and school functions because I didn't want to have to play off another solo appearance. In fact, for prom my Senior Year, my DAD bought me a corsage to wear. (which was totally bittersweet... I was so surprised and it made me love my dad even more!) Looking back, it seems totally ridiculous that I would ever carry so much doubt on my shoulders, but reality is I did, and most days I'd leave school hating myself because there wasn't even a guy that wanted to sit by me- let alone invest long-term in me. I share all this not for pity, but to provide better understanding for you of who I am and what this union means to me.

I spent many conversations throughout those years arguing with people that the Disney movies really could happen in a girl's life. I re-call a specific friend that I would argue with time and time again. My argument was that it WAS in fact possible to find the PERFECT guy. Of course, the main reason I argued it is to try to convince myself that all I was saying was true... 

After being freed from the torment of walking halls everyday filled with dramatic romances (high school graduation!), I finally discovered what mattered more than anything Disney could ever portray. I discovered the complete joy of being obsessed with Jesus Christ. I knew Him, but never like this! I discovered what it means in His Word when it says to TASTE that the Lord is good.... I was actually tasting it!!! The few years right out of high school were intimate, and full of new discoveries in my spiritual walk. 

THEN, it HAPPENED. My tears, my arguments, my doubt, and my fear of having no future were all washed away... For the first time ever, on September 28, 2008, a guy told me I was beautiful! But, he didn't just say it, and he wasn't just talking about my looks. He was looking deep inside and saying it about my life. No boyfriend, no prom date, no "experience", and he still wanted ME. My first dating relationship was my last! As I share this with you, I sit here in the puddle of a melted heart. I remember when I was 16 years old, on another tough day of feeling worthless and ugly, I prayed a prayer that I never truly believed would be answered. It went something like this,

"Jesus, I know this is really unusual, but I have a special request. If there's any way for me to only date one guy, and that be my husband, please make it so. I only want to give my heart away once, to someone who can keep it."

Well my friends, this prayer was answered. The latter part of the verse I mentioned above says to SEE that the Lord is good. "Oh taste, and see, that the Lord is good!" Here is the evidence, if for some reason I needed to see it again. He wrote an incredible love story for me, and all those days when I thought He'd forgotten about me, He hadn't. He was just still writing.